I’ve Got A Sheriff
(To the tune of I Shot The Sheriff by Bob Marley and the Wailers)
I’ve got a sheriff, but I could not spot a deputy
I’ve got a sheriff, but I could not spot a deputy
All around my rural town
They’re driving up and down
They say they want to bring in the guilty
But there’s no sign of a deputy
There’s no help from the deputies
But I say
I’ve got a sheriff, but I must rely on self-defense
I’ve got a sheriff, but he never helps no matter the offense
The County always hated us
For what I don’t know
Every time that they do us down
They say, “If you don’t like it; why don’t you go”
They say, “If you don’t like it; why don’t you go”
I say
I’ve got a sheriff, but I had to buy a chain-link fence
I’ve got a sheriff, but I must rely on my own defense
Money came my way one day
And I started out of town
All of a sudden I see the Tax Assessor
Aiming to do me down
So I shot, I shot him down
I say
I shot the tax man, and I finally see a deputy
I shot the tax man, and I finally saw a deputy
Reflexes got the better of me
And maybe that’s as it should be
Every day those fuckers go to the well
But one day the bottom will drop out
Yes, one day the bottom will drop out
But I say
I shot the tax man, now they’re suiting up the deputies
I shot the tax man, now they’re shooting up what’s left of me
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A seventh song for “Rabid Lemmings: The Musical” – I say “God Damn the Tax Assessor Man.”